A Declaration

I have something to say. This is more for people who do not know me and will probably never see this blog but I must say it nonetheless. I AM A MAN! At least the genitalia I have carried since my birth indicates so. This may seem an odd thing to say but let me share events that have culminated in this statement.

Yesterday I got a phone call from one of the many medical establishments my wife and children frequent and the gentleman on the phone asked if I was Jacob's mom. I told him I was Jacob's dad. After a slight pause he asked for Jacob's mom. This morning, again I received a phone call. This time they wanted to know if I was Emilee's mom. I said no I was Emilee's dad could I take a message. After a slight pause she divulged the information she had to give. Normally, these events do not bother me but every once in a while I feel the need to scream out, I AM A MAN!

Most little boys get daddy's nose and mama's smile. I grew up and got daddy's nose and mama's voice. You see, since I was a young man I have had difficulty with people who hearing me without seeing me think I am a woman. I used to have lovely conversations with my mother's friends thinking they were talking with her until I would inform them I would get her for them. One conversation with a caller occurred shortly before my mission when I was living quite alone. The call came somewhere around two o'clock in the morning. The man apologized for bothering me and hoped I had not woken my husband. I assured him it was alright. He thought me horrid for not worrying about waking my husband. I again assured him it was alright because I was single. He then wanted to know what a sweet young thing as myself was doing unmarried. He was completely shocked when I informed him of my gender, said a hasty good-bye and hung up. It is one of the most hilarious moments of my life and shall not be forgotten.

So if ever you should call my house and a woman answers the phone, believe me when I tell you I am not. Now the next question I shall have to answer is whether or not I am gay. Perhaps I will keep you wonderin' on that one. Good Day!

Comments

  1. GretchenApril 16, 2009 at 2:04 PM

    I love your voice and always know it's yiu when we talk. It's Mom that confuses you with being the RS Pres. But you know that is now just good humor! Well written. I can't decide on a topic so I have not posted...hmmmm

    ReplyDelete

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